Don’t be hard on yourself, we all use it- the excuse of having no time. It is just that however, an excuse. A way for us to get out or avoid something in our life. So instead of coming up with excuses and causing more emotional distress, it is time to organize our priorities and cut out unneeded obligations.
Priority List
Step 1. List out all wants, needs, and obligations.
You need to understand why you do everything in your life. Next to every item write down why you participate in this activity. Does it bring you joy? Does it help you stay safe? Does it move you closer to specific goals? There is a big difference between ‘must do’s’ and ‘choose to do’s’.
Step 2. Rank your priorities.
Count up how many properties are on your list and rank them from most important to least important. Depending on how many items you have, you may have to create a few drafts before you feel like the order is correct.
Step 3. Reflect.
What is on your plate that does not reflect your goals? Are their things you do because it is a social obligation? Do you do some of these things so others like you or so that you feel like you fit in? You might find that habits fall into this section- where your not sure why you continue to do the behavior.
Step 4. Start slashing.
Take unimportant (but maybe socially obligated) things off your list. If it doesn’t reflect your goals or maintenance of important aspects- it needs to go. Stop worrying about social obligations or pressure to do something- people who care about you will understand and may even find healthier, more productive ways to interact with you.
Step 5. Know what you neglect.
The second half of your list may be visited less often and there are consequences of that. You need to know what the long term consequences are of neglecting one part over another and if you can accept that. This is time for you to make sure that your ranking still holds true.
Step 6. Check back.
Assess often (even set a reminder on your phone for 3-6 weeks out) on how things are going and if you need to switch things around. Your list will never be stagnant due to the dynamics of life.
Keep in mind
– Know what your time is worth, time is the most valuable resource we have.
– Make sure you are doing this task while thinking about how things generally are, not basing it on a single event.
– Be honest and straightforward with the non-high priority ranked items. If these happen to be people- don’t lead them on or continually change plans on them. People will respect you more if you respect them more.
– Sometimes we have surprise items that come up that we need to address. If you start to get overwhelmed, keep yourself focused on the task at hand and tell yourself, “that (other item) is not a priority right now.”
My Challenge to you: Go through this process and let me know how it goes. This is personally how I organize my busy life and it has been a life saver. Prioritizing can also make your more decisive, assertive, and confidence in your choices- because you know the goals and directions you want to move in.
Happy prioritizing friends!
– Jessie the Therapist
Photo by: Andrew Neel
